parents (value/people)

Having a positive relationship with your parents

As you grow up your relationship with your parents starts to change. You're growing into a young man or woman and your parents are also growing older. They still care for you but are probably having as much difficulty as you are in adapting to your changing relationship.

• You are no longer totally dependent on them and you want to become even more independent.
• They are still responsible for your welfare and are trying to use their experience to guide you.

As a result there is often conflict. How you all handle this conflict is really important. Your parents will always be your parents so work hard to communicate and be prepared to compromise.

Here are a few tips to maintain a positive relationship with the people who love you most in all the world.

• Be respectful when discussing any areas of disagreement.
• Be willing to listen to your parent's view.
• Stay calm.
• Be non-blaming, don't accuse.
• Stick to the issue - don't get side tracked into other areas.
• Use a team approach to working out problems - work at it together, think about what you both want in common and work out together how you can get there.
• Use a problem solving model like this one:
1. Decide together exactly what the problem is.
2. Brainstorm the possible solutions - be open and creative.
3. Think out the consequences of each possible solution.
4. Choose one idea and do it.
5. Did it work? If so, congratulate yourself and each other. If not, go back to step 2 and try another idea.

Try out the above ideas but it's hard to learn conflict resolution and problem solving just by reading it. See if someone can help you out face to face. http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetails.aspx?p=243&np=291&id=2230